Maybe You Should Get Started (Or Stop Stalling)
Photo by Suganth on Unsplash
Hey there, hero!
People respond differently to “toward” language than they do to “away from” language.
So I’m going to try to cover everyone that ever watches this video.
Toward language: get started.
Away from language: stop stalling.
Hope this helps!
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Raw YouTube Captioning
hey there it’s David H Lawrence the 17th
and today I want to talk to you about
your language your language actually the
language that you react to one of the
ways that people are kind of
compartmentalized and it’s on a spectrum
so you’re not one or the other is how
you react to what some psychologists
call toward language or away from
language so as an example toward
language is here are ten ways to do this
world class the best in the world do it
great and away from language is here are
five things you want to avoid making
serious mistakes or you’ll fail you know
toward language is encouraging it’s
positive it’s how to accomplish
something by doing the right things away
from language is also encouraging and
positive but instead it’s telling you
how to avoid dying or complete an utter
failure by not making these mistakes so
it’s two ways of getting to the same
place and what I’d like to submit to you
today with the words maybe you should
before each one of these phrases is both
the toward language and the away from
language that talks about moving to the
next point in your life or putting into
motion a project that you wanted to do
or up leveling your life in some way
professionally or physically or
relationship wise the toward language is
hey maybe you should get started just
get started even if it’s a little thing
we’ve talked about this before one
little thing one step one little tiny
step that puts you in motion toward what
you want toward the goals that you want
that’s the toward language
be away from languages maybe you should
maybe you should stop trying to get all
your ducks in a row and making sure all
your pencils are lined up straight and
making sure you have a clean slight of
paper clean notebook nothing messy
everything’s lined up perfectly and even
then I’m hungry or I need to go to the
bathroom or yeah I you’re stalling stop
so again proceeding both phrases with
maybe you should toward language get
started do it now you want to become a
professional at something or you want to
uplevel your your skill set at something
get started do it now
away from language maybe you should stop
stalling you want to uplevel yourself
you want to become a pro at something
stop stalling stop making excuses just
try it you’re gonna make mistakes it’s
gonna be a little messy it’s not gonna
be great right off the bat you’re gonna
have to learn what you don’t know and
fix it and so on but stop stalling so
which one works best for you you tell me
in the comments below and maybe it’s a
combination of the two you know what
works best for you let me know leave me
a comment is it get started or stop
stalling is it the toward language or
the away from language which is it I’d
love to know let me know and let me know
why to have you noticed this in your
life that you gravitate towards the
things that knowed you along and
encourage you and hey go get’em or are
you are you motivated by the things that
say okay here’s what not to do so you
don’t make a mistake that kind of stuff
I’m a little bit of both I’m a little
bit of both I’m gonna be exploring that
more in the future when I talk about
what really motivates me and maybe it
motivates you too and it’s coming up in
the future I’m just I’m just pre saging
so leave me a comment if you want to be
on my mailing list there’s a little box
below that says get on the list love to
have you on the list I’m David H
Lawrence xvii I thank you so much for
watching and I will talk to you tomorrow.
The mid 2-1/2 min point makes me think of your “Ready, Fire, Aim!” exhortation. 🙂
“Stop stalling” helps me to identify a behavior that may be holding me back, which gives more insight into how to get off the dime than a mere “get started.” Therefore, I find the ‘away from’ language more helpful.
Hello, I have just started the free lessons over on Vo2gogo. So I am going to wait untill I have complete that before I go ahead with Vohero
For me its a combination of the toward and away from language. Because I am usually in one or both states of mind at all times. lol. This kind of communication takes into account how complex we can be as people. And it shows that the speaker is really in touch with the audience. I would also say that hearing both helps me do some soul searching at that moment. Like after I just watched this, I asked myself, “Am I stalling? Do I need to start?” I myself didnt really know what I needed to hear until I sort of asked myself both. And afterward I realized, I am stalling. If I only heard the one message, I might have missed what I needed. David you usually take time to address all types of people in your audience and that is a major strength and reason why I think you are an effective coach. Great video to start my day-thank you
I think I respond most positively to the “Get started” language, when it comes with a healthy dose of motivation. It makes me know I’m up to the task and I’ll feel so good once I just start! But I also respond to “Stop stalling!” in that it makes me feel bad enough about procrastinating that I just might nudge myself to take that next step forward. Of course, I prefer to feel positive than negative, but both work in their own ways! I think the key, for me, is to feel motivated and empowered so I can confidently push ahead.
In general, I would say toward language as I feel is has underlying support where as away has a ‘sightly’ negative feel to it. However, I need to listen to both :-).
I think I do better with the “towards language.” The away from language seems to be my native tongue. I don’t really need any more of that. What I typically need is the little push over the hump.
I tend to listen to both, although “away’ language can at times seem like negative reinforcement . As a sidelight, and FYI, I was a psychiatric nurse for years (working on a high security locked mental health unit). In my interactions with patients, I found that “toward” language seemed to be much more effective in helping them to a more positive place…
These videos always make me think and with each I come away inspired.
I just wanted to make a general observation today.
The cadence and pacing of your voice and the patient way in which you walk us through what you want to say is a tremendous comfort. You make your messages feel very personal and engaging in a way that reminds me of how comforted and encouraged I was as a kid listening to Mister Rogers. Take that as a high compliment, and thanks for doing these. 🙂
Stop stalling works best for me. It just stops the bs in my mind and gets me to laugh at myself and then get going. Great motivation. Thank you.
There is a kids’ game, “hot and cold”, in which an object is hidden in a room and one person, who did not see where it is hidden, is given clues by the others, who know where it is hidden. When the seeker movers far from the object he is told her is getting colder. When he moves closer to the object he is told he is getting warmer or hotter. I heard somewhere that in a version of this game in which only one kind of clue is given, either “hot” clues or “cold” clues, the seeker almost always finds the object significantly faster and easier with just “hot” (positive, close to) clues than with just “cold” (negative, far from) clues. I don’t know how it compares with using both kinds of clues.
I have never checked this out for my self but it might be fun to try.
Get started is better for me. I like the focus you put on mindset, which is now in the curriculum. I’m trying to put much of your positive, forward language into practice. Thanks for the video David.
Get Started! is more positive and motivating for me than focusing on Stop Stalling! which makes me defensive. I do occasionally read some “5 things you shouldn’t do” type articles and such, but try to focus on “You will be great if you do these great things”.
While I like hearing the “get started” what resonates is the “stop stalling”. Interesting…