What Is The Most Generous Assumption You Can Make?

well hey there hero it’s David H
Lawrence the seventeenth and today I
want to talk to you about our internal
conversation the thing that we tell
ourselves when we don’t actually know
what’s going on and there’s a couple of
situations that have cropped up recently
to kind of pop this into place for me
number one was when we don’t hear back
after an audition and number two was
when we don’t know why somebody’s acting
the way they’re acting whether and
they’re kind of connected because you
know you go in and you you you guys all
know about RBF resting bitchface and
you’re doing something for a producer or
a casting director and they have this
like blank look on their face and you’re
like they hated me they pretty much
hated me but what I think might be an
interesting exercise when that sort of
thing happens or when you don’t hear
back from a voiceover audition or when
somebody doesn’t respond to you via
email right away or return your phone
call or give you the answer that you
were thinking about instead of ascribing
the worst possible conditions to the
situation they hate me they don’t want
to be a part of what I’m doing
I’m not good enough they they have more
important people to talk to whatever it
is those aren’t very generous and those
aren’t very easy on your own psyche so
what I would love to have you do and
it’s something that I’ve seen people in
positions of power do when they have
really good levels of responsibility and
and are you know positive in nature they
go for the most generous assumption that
they can make and I would think that
that might be helpful to you instead of
thinking they hate me they don’t they
don’t want me I’m not good enough
they’re not getting back to me because
I’m bothering them I didn’t do a good
job instead how about they have a life
too
maybe life got in the way
they didn’t return your call or your
email right away because something’s
happening with them they actually how
many times have you done that where you
thought why didn’t you call me back and
then they call you back they go yeah I
got all tied up but I really wanted to
talk to you it doesn’t pay to assume the
worst that’s the whole point if you
don’t know why not assume the best why
not go with the most generous assumption
that you can make it’s easier on you and
it’s most likely the case as opposed to
they hate you but to get to where you
needed to be to get that audition
opportunity you didn’t do that and get
that by being bad you didn’t do that and
get that by being too old or too you
know unskilled you got it by being where
you are today when you sent the email
maybe it got shuffled into spam maybe it
got lost in a whole row of emails that
they got rid of all at once who knows
what the situation was maybe you called
and they looked at the number on their
phone they didn’t recognize it they let
it go to voicemail and they never
checked their voicemail who knows but
I’m telling you that the option of using
the most generous assumption as opposed
to the most you know horrible
possibilities they hate me I’m not good
enough you have that choice why not make
the choice of assuming that everything’s
fine with you it’s just something going
on with them
it’s just something going on with their
schedule or with their tech or with
their project who knows but you have a
choice and you can choose to blame
yourself and you can choose to think the
worst or you can choose to say I’m okay
it’s probably just something going on
with them and follow up if you want to
give them some time but don’t ascribe
the worst to a situation I’m just I’m
just trying to make your mind feel more
at ease because we often build these
stories into these huge problems that
just simply don’t exist
you experience that I’m sure where you
thought the worst and found out that it
was something completely different than
that so why not do that all the time
just to thought what are your thoughts
tell me in the comments below I’d love
to know what you think if you want to
get on my list I’d love to have you on
the list but mostly I’d love a comment
from you I’d love to see what you think
about what I’m doing here with these
videos I’m David H Lawrence the 17th I
thank you so much for watching and I
will talk to you tomorrow.