Photo by HIVAN ARVIZU @soyhivan on Unsplash
I was talking with a performer at a voice over meetup, and he confided in me that he absolutely hated the type of event we were at.
“I hate it. Just hate it.”
We had a chat about what he hated about it, and I think we may have found a solution.
Hope this helps!
Links to all episodes
One Step At A Time
Five Ways To Have An Excellent Coffee Date With Me
Five Ways To Have A Crappy Coffee Date With Me
Taking Advantage Of The Wisdom Of The Tribe
How To Be A World Class Complainer
The False Nobility Of The Struggle
Watch Out – The Rules Are Going To Change
“Show Me The Secret, Daddy!”
Coaching vs Consulting vs Facilitating
The Perils of Live Performance And Why Jeremy Kappell Should Not Have Been Fired
Let’s Welcome To The Stage…Failure!
Don’t Confuse Price With Value
Whiteboards In The Hallways
Go Wake Up Your Luck
Playing and Planning
The Two Things Most Talent Try to Accomplish Way Too Soon
10,000 Hours To Become Good At Something? Not Really.
The Curse of Knowledge
The Trick Charlie Munger Uses To Make Better Decisions
Everyone’s A Customer, Not Just Your Customers
“What do you mean, you’re a ‘process guy’?”
Pay Attention To Your Storytelling, Not Removing Your Breaths
How To Conquer FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out)
The Problem In Every Commercial Script
The Job In Every Commercial Script
The Secret In Every Commercial Script
How To Pick Your Stage Name
Voice Over Is REALLY Hard. Until It Isn’t.
Helping Make Resolutions Stick
ACX Jobs: They’re ALL SAG-AFTRA-Friendly
Non-Union? You Can Still Open An AFTRA H&R Account. What?
Who Says You Need To “Feel Like It?”
Are You Engaged?
Your Day Job Might Just Be Worth Keeping For A Bit Longer
Want To Learn Something Really Well? Teach It To Others
Don’t Confuse What Works With What You Like
The Lost Keys And The Microphone In My Elevator
My Insane Backup System Plus Two Helpful Tips
What Open Loops Are And Why They Work So Well
Two More Things For Which You Can Use Open Loops
Three Things Not To Say Or Do…When Trying To Learn Something New
Front Burner and Back Burner Project Management
How To Properly List The Accents and Dialects You Perform
My SAG-AFTRA Presentation On VO Demos (Part 1)
My SAG-AFTRA Presentation On VO Demos (Part 2)
A Simple, One-Word Decision-Making Question To Ask Yourself
How You Can Use The MVP Model As A Performer
How Lazy Can You Be?
Avoid The Struggle Porn
The Robocall Equivalent Of Unsubscribe
Saying Goodbye To A “Failure”
Making Your Links Irresistible
HTTPS Is Not Just For Banks – It’s For You
The Threat That Made Me Create a New Page For LAME
The Resource You Must Guard Most Carefully
How New Media Is Using The Oldest Ad Model Ever
“You Could Be Hit By A Bus!”
Killing Customers With Kindness
I Found Out What She Was Podcasting About
How I Answered Voices.com’s Inquiry
Turning Mountains Into Molehills
Motivation: Your Three Big Needs In A Cool Little Package
Go Ahead. Multitask. But Try It Like This.
The Prodigy Game Doesn’t Deserve This Treatment
I Don’t Want To Go Blind
What Fair Markets Are, And Why Voices.com Isn’t One
Trevor’s Three A’s From Apple On Killing Customers With Kindness
Getting Ready vs. Getting Started
You’ll Never Believe Who Got Rejected By Harvard
There Is No Failure, Only Feedback
Who Is Your Most Dangerous Adversary?
73 Videos In, My First Hater Appears
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Your Glasses And Crucial Laptop Positioning Info
One More Insanely Over-engineered Piece Of Gear: My UPS
The Crazy Backward Way IKEA Prices Their Stuff
Voices.com Complained To YouTube That I Violated Their Privacy
The Gig Economy: RIP?
For Your Health: Not Perfect. Just Better.
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The Guaranteed Way To Completely Avoid Criticism
The Two Things People Judge About You Within Seconds
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Audible Retail Samples: Why They Suck And Why It Doesn’t Really Matter
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Jamie Has Some Thoughts About Fiverr
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The Real Purpose Of The “Can You Hear Me?” Phone Scam
Beware Of Overkill
Laying Down The Perfect Slate
An AMA Preview: The Word “Ethnic” – A Slur, Or An Essential Adjective?
10 Rules of Profitable Self Discipline from Napoleon Hill
AMA (Ask Me Anything): Here Are The Answers (Part 1)
AMA (Ask Me Anything): Here Are The Answers (Part 2)
AMA (Ask Me Anything): Here Are The Answers (Part 3)
AMA (Ask Me Anything): Here Are The Answers (Part 4)
AMA Answers Part 5 Plus A Medical Warning
Last AMA Answers (#6): Gear, Services and Success
A 7-Word Reminder: “Don’t correct people when it matters little.”
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I’m Leaving Facebook: Why Groups and FB Live No Longer Spark Joy
Time To Accept That I’ve Failed At Something – Happily
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Why Gen Z And Millennials’ Love For Audiobooks Is Crucial
American Idol: It’s All About Story, Not Just Singing
Less Beating Yourself Up, More Talking Yourself Up
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Vocal Care: It’s All About What Works For You
3 Biases You Should Be Aware Of
3 More Biases You Should Also Be Aware Of
Wow. People Really Grokked Biases. Let’s Tackle Fallacies.
Three More Fallacies You Need To Watch For
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Fallacy Follies, Volume 3
Two Last Big Creativity-Crippling Fallacies
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A New Lead Source For Performers: Voice Assistants And Smart Speakers
A Great Way To Handle Trolls and Haters
Quantity Does Not Usually Equal Quality
Is Facebook Truly A Monopoly? No More Than Microsoft Was.
Fear Of The Unknown, Or The Day Before My Surgery
A Strange Aspect To Performing That Should Be Cause For Protest, But Isn’t
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Why I Give My Agents 10% Of Everything
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Why I Use One Single Channel For Crucial Communication
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Fred Willard (and Billy West) On Quickly Creating Authentic VO Characters
Leo Makes Your Searching Spectacular
On Asking For Things Performers Can’t Do
How To Battle The Urge of “Efficiency”
One More Best-Of-Breed Way To Brilliantly Complain
Changing Audacity’s Sampling Rate To 48,000 Hz
10 Words Of Encouragement When You’re Stuck
One More Best-Of-Breed Way To Brilliantly Complain
Why You Must Wear Headphones When Recording
Two Cases Where You Might Not Want To Simply “Follow Your Passion”
Having Fun With Headphone Volume
Please Stop Rushing To Perform
Something To Consider: Everyone’s Internal Menu
One Crazy Key To Creativity: Pure, Unadulterated Boredom
For The Sheer Joy Of It
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Do Networking Events Make You Anxious? Let’s Fix That.
The Difference Between Mansplaining and Advice?
Project X Is Just About Ready. I’m A Bit Giddy.
Raw YouTube Captioning
hey there it’s David H Lawrence the 17th
and just a couple days ago I was at a
voiceover of performers meet up happens
every month here in Los Angeles
it’s called voices anonymous hi David
and it basically is a get-together of
like-minded people people that are
working in the industry want to work in
the industry maybe have been working for
a while we have some teachers in there
we have some students in there we have
some people who are not in class or
teaching class but just generally doing
the work it’s kind of fun I love it Bob
and Patty do a great job with it and I
was talking with one of the attendees at
this past this past month meeting and he
admitted to me that he absolutely hates
these kinds of events just hates them
and my first question was well why are
you here if you hate them well I feel
like I have to be at them because if not
then I’m gonna miss something so fear of
missing out which we’ve done another
video on but I said why do you hate it
and his answer was really interesting he
said it’s a crapshoot I never know
whether the person that I introduced
myself to is going to be interesting or
and that was a moment of really harsh
honesty that I found refreshing and I
told him so I said well that’s really
honest I mean you know you most people
wouldn’t say that she they’d say oh I’m
just you know I’m shy by nature or I
don’t know ever know what to say and he
goes well I don’t usually know what to
say either but but usually I’m I’m much
more anxious about the idea that the
person that I do represent you know or
introduce myself to will spend the next
hour drawing my ear off and you know
that’s happened to all of us right we we
don’t necessarily want to take the time
that we have allotted for that
particular event and somehow you know
our idea waste it with someone who isn’t
going to be useful to us in the future
or isn’t going to be interesting to talk
to or it’s going to bore us or is going
to and so part of that is understanding
how to enter and exit a conversation
gracefully which is a subject for
but the other thing is and he said this
I don’t know what to say and I usually
have something to ask or talk about when
I start and oftentimes I’m the one
that’s approached as opposed to me
approaching someone I try but before I
ever get a chance to do it somebody’s
coming up to me and so when I do get a
chance to do it I love using an opener
like you know I’ve been thinking about
this a lot over the last few weeks and I
wonder what your opinion is of this and
then asking a question that opens the
conversation in our world you know like
do events like this make you anxious
what’s the best voiceover job you ever
had I’ve been talking to people about it
like crazy or I actually saw an article
with some suggestions on it let me see
what they say oh if you could choose any
new performance skill to learn what
would it be what’s your definition of
success I love that because I certainly
have one you guys know it you don’t do
more of what works less of what doesn’t
and figure out what works and what
doesn’t but if you have some of that in
your back pocket the little thing that
you need to overcome with that
is that it might feel contrived that oh
I had this you know cold opening you
know icebreaker in my back pocket and I
wanted to use it you know just ask it
naturally and ask it with real intention
of understanding the result and
understanding how that fits in with you
because you know you never know you
might be really surprised at the answers
that some people give you and also you
know there’s lots of other options for
how to approach that hey could you
settle an argument for me I you know
I’ve been been arguing with my best
friend about this for a while and then
present something or you know the kind
of the kind of thing that I’ve been
asked a lot is how did you get started
where did you learn all this stuff why
do you like that particular microphone
very specific things but what it reminds
me of is that people sometimes have an
issue with just opening up and being
vulnerable at events like that they’re
like I’m frightened to talk I don’t want
to waste my time I don’t want to waste
somebody else’s time and if you just
give yourself the permission to be
curious and interested and to engage in
what other people are thinking and doing
and be a good listener right when you
ask questions let them talk
and ask them more questions about that
when you do that you start to learn all
kinds of things and the anxiety kind of
drops away because now you’ve got a
mission now you’ve got a path to follow
so I hope that helps I don’t know how
many of you are nervous or anxious when
you go to networking events or when you
go to workshops or when you go to
classes let me know in the comments
below what your life is like when you go
to live events or when you go to online
events what’s it like for you is it easy
for you to open up or is it tough for
you to open up and really explore why
let me know why I want to know because
it’s fascinating to me you know pretend
we’re at a meet-up and I’ve asked you
what is it that you like or don’t like
about events like this right but by the
way please do that not on YouTube if
that’s where you’re watching this video
the website because and we give you the
link in the YouTube video so you can
find that the website is where all my
tools are and where things are sane and
moderated I’d really prefer that you you
do things there if you’d like to be on
my list I’d love to have you there’s a
box below this video that says join the
list and we’d love to have you on that
list and if you’d like to see the latest
video I’ve done I’ve got one very
special coming up for you I’m about
ready to do an event with my coaches and
when I’m done with that event I’m gonna
share a video with you and we’re moving
forward with project decks so it’s gonna
be a lot of fun anyway if you’d like to
know when that happens join my list but
if you’d like to see the latest video
I’ve produced then go ahead click on
that frame there and YouTube will play
it for you I’m David H Lawrence xvii I
thank you so much for watching and I
will talk to you tomorrow.