13272: How Do You Feel When A Friend Gets The Gig?

Raw transcript:

You’re sitting there, you’re watching
your television, and all of a sudden you
hear a voice that you recognize, a
friend of yours, or you see an actor in
an episode of a television show or in a
film that you know, how do you feel? How
do you feel at that very moment? What
feelings well up inside you when you see
someone you know have success?
Let’s talk about that in this episode of
the VO Heroes podcast.
Being in this kind of business can be
really really
wearing. It can be debilitating to your
energy level because it’s so hard. There
are so few jobs. No matter what category
of work you’re in, you’re a writer,
you’re you’re one of my actors, you’re
one of my voice talent, whatever you
are, uh there’s far less work than there
are people ready to fill those jobs. And
as we pursue doing this work,
somebody’s going to get the job.
Usually, it’s not us. You know, if if
you are experiencing so much success
that you don’t have time to do
everything, that’s fantastic. That’s not
the shared experience, the the uh the
life experience that most people in this
business have. Even people who are
really good at what they do, understand
the workflow, understand how to acquire
auditions, how to acquire uh, you know,
potential script work or book work or
voice work. It’s still a chore to
convert that to a booking.
And yet, somebody’s going to get the
job. And so, eventually, things that
you’ve auditioned for, things that you
pursued
will be handed to someone, if not you,
than someone else. And eventually,
they’ll be post-produced and put up for
people to consume, to to watch, to
listen to, whatever.
And when you see somebody that isn’t
you, but somebody that you know, not
somebody that you don’t know, somebody
that you have no relationship with,
but somebody that you do know,
what does that create for you in terms
of feelings inside? I’ll share with you
how I feel. I feel so happy. And not in
a fake way. Oh, that’s that’s so nice
for you. Not in that kind of way. in a,
“Oh, this is so cool. He’s so good.
She’s so good. She got this job. This is
great.” You know, I I love seeing people
whether they’re in my category of work
and I could have auditioned against them
for uh the part or not. Uh if I see
people that I know, maybe clients, maybe
just friends, maybe uh you know, people
that I worked with at some point in
time, it just makes me feel spectacular.
And when I see somebody
perform in a role, either a voice role
or
an on camera role that I auditioned for.
Uh I’m curious as to how they execute,
always do great work, cuz you know, it’s
kind of hard to get on television or in
film or on uh on uh you know, the the
speakers that come out of your devices
if you’re not good. And
I tend to want to study what happened,
but I still have this overall feeling of
joy.
And I have even more joy when it’s
somebody that I know because it’s
somebody that I know. It’s like, “Oh,
great. They get a paycheck. They get
another credit. They get to learn. They
get to work with other people on the
set. This is super spectacular. They’re
going to be all excited about it. Their
families are going to be excited about
like there’s this joy that happens.” Now
I do know that there are some people
who get upset,
who get jealous, who get a little angry,
a little really what? Why him? Why her?
Um it’s
it’s somewhat of a natural reaction. Uh
and like most reactions, it’s born of
how we are raised. uh how things are
modeled around us, how other people
reflect success and uh failure. Um, but
if you allow yourself to be emotionally
charged in a negative way, when somebody
you know uh gets work or somebody gets
work in a role that you’ve auditioned
for and it isn’t you, um, I would urge
you to do some work on being able to not
only accept that for what it is,
somebody got work. It’s pretty cool. Uh,
but also to engage in uh, joy for them.
joy for them, which will rub off on you.
That’s my advice to you is that if you
feel great and I’m I’m, you know,
thankful that I didn’t have to work on
this. I’ve always kind of felt that way.
Uh, you know, when I was trying out for
the little league team or whatever, if I
didn’t get it and somebody else did, I
was like, “Oh, that’s cool for you.” I
didn’t even think much about it. I did
see others getting upset and I didn’t
understand quite why.
But especially in our business, in the
creative pursuit, uh the performance
business, the writing business with so
few jobs available for such a huge
bolus of participants who all could do a
serviceable job but didn’t quite fit
with the other people in the scene or
the the age range. Who knows? Who knows
why it happened,
but it happened. And I urge you to
germinate the seed of joy for that. You
know, if you can, if you find yourself
feeling jealousy, if you find yourself
feeling anger, if you find yourself
feeling less than or other than, or if
you start doing things like, “Well,
clearly they were looking for, you know,
somebody who isn’t bald.”
You know, I I don’t You may tell stories
to yourself as to why you didn’t get the
gig. That may or may not be true.
Usually not. Uh if you’re watching this
episode, uh I’m pretty sure you’re
pursuing things professionally and you
have quite a skill set. So just know
that when you get the gig, other people
are looking at your performance with
hopefully joy and not negative feelings.
That’s what I would imagine you’d want
for you and for them. So here’s what I’d
love. I’d love for you to tell me in the
comments below that moment. That moment
when you recognize somebody on
television and you interrupt your your
significant other and and she says to
you, “I’m watching the show.” But yeah,
but that’s John. It’s like, you know,
tell me how that feels right at that
moment. And and be honest if if you are
like, “Yeah, I kind of like kind of
don’t want to look cuz it’s it makes me
a little uh feel a little uh you know,
not so great.” tell me in a way that is
comfortable for you. I’m not trying to
make anybody feel bad, but I I’d like to
have a discussion around this because
all boats rise with the tide and it can
be very Polyiana, but if we just support
each other, it can be helpful
and it can be not only helpful to them,
that person that you’re supporting, but
to you as well. There are so many
benefits from enjoying
this mutual aid society that we have in
being a performer. Does that make sense?
Let me let me know what you think. And
by let me know, I mean on vioheres.com.
That’s where the conversation is sane
and polite and especially kind of like
this, you know, uh this kind of a of a
tough to talk about sometimes issue. Oh,
I get these feelings and you know, let’s
do it there at vioheres.com. Uh, you can
also hit the like button if you like
what you’re hearing. You can, uh,
subscribe to the channel. You can click
the notification bell and we’ll let you
know when a new episode comes out. Uh,
you can share this with another actor
who you see getting a little uh, you
know, fleempt over somebody getting the
gig that he or she didn’t get. Uh, you
can if you want to. Uh, I’d love it if
you did. I’m David H. Lawrence 17th. I
thank you so much for watching and for
listening and I will see you in the next
episode of the VO Heroes Podcast.

(from YouTube)